Every morning when I take my shower seems to be the time of day when I get the most sadness and anguish over the wait time and the lack of information we are getting from anyone.
Rule changes and no information are taking their toll.
I think it hits me in the shower because it is the only time of the day where I am not thinking about a million things and dealing with them. That and I am still mostly asleep and trying to wake up, and it is also one of the rare occasions when I am alone.
Warm water rushing over me as I wonder when we will finally get our little girl home, and then my mind puts that into perspective and I also start to wonder if we will ever complete this adoption.
It is amazing how sad this makes me and also makes you realize how little control you have over the entire process. At least during the "Paper Chase" you knew what you had to do and where you had to go to do it. Now you just wait until someone half a world away decides that you are worthy of taking care of one of China's orphaned children.
The only thing that keeps you going is the possibility that things will get better, and the ultimate improvement will be a little gitl to take care of and love.
